..Had this nasty cod/flu combo last week...did ya miss me?
When will we learn to love ourselves? I am intrigued by the events of the last week. Not so much for the events themselves but in the reactions they have elicited from people.
Without love, we seem cast adrift on the tide of the masses: action reaction, action reaction. Up the boat goes, down it comes...
Christian, Muslim, bound by the winds of change and the whims of those who would 'lead' us whether we really know how they got there or not..
Bang the drum, rally the masses, wave the flag...
Only through love can you shed your need to be told, for your freedom to know. Only through love can you show the world that acceptance begins when tolerance ends. Should Osama Bin Laden be dead? He is dead, so I guess that is yes. Should you rejoice? If you feel you need to, ask yourself what happens when you're finished rejoicing; what then? Ask yourself how many of the 311 million other Americans are actually dancing in the street with you. After that, consider that the next time you see people dancing in the street in Islamabad how many of the 1.21 Billion people from their country they represent.
If you are off-put by those who rejoice, ask yourself what is in you that is off-put. Not, what is in them that makes them want to. In the still small voice that engages in that discussion, you will find yourself. That is where love resides. It is in yourself, by yourself and in relationship to yourself that judgment resides. When you judge someone else, what criteria are you judging them by? Your perfection or your imperfection? If you are perfect, what difference would it make what anyone else does?
I know these things because I judge sometimes in a knee-jerk reaction and it feels terrible. I used to do it all the time, with all the emotion I could muster and then I felt even more terrible. When I don't judge I am closer to myself than at any other time. Closer to freedom, closer to love. When you practice non-judgment, its a heck of a cool game with a win/win every time. Are you always successful? Yes because the minute you catch yourself judging and put yourself in the other persons shoes you're one step closer to who you want to be whether you realize it or not.
The next time you refer to a Muslim or a Christian as they, ask yourself if you are a 'they'. Perhaps you'll say" if they means a Christian, I guess I am, or, if they means Muslim, I guess I am. Then try saying it without the word I and see how far you get. They don't dance in the streets. A collection of I's do. If not, than they represent you in everything they do.
The world is safer without Bin Laden in it. Not too many people disagree with that. How much safer it is, will have to do not only with each individual reaction to his death, but with each individual reaction to the reaction.
And finally I leave you with this video. A little beauty in a world where choice is as it has always been, right there with you! Stay beautiful. C ya next week.
http://wimp.com/brainautotuned
Tuesday, May 3, 2011
Tuesday, April 19, 2011
Anything is possible:
What remarkable creatures we are. I love that people send me the most inspiring things. This week I've seen videos of a one legged tango dancer that made me feel like the reason I couldn't dance was that I had too many legs! I saw a TED video of a man who was an amazing Graffiti artist who was stricken with a disease and now, with the help of incredibly simple but powerful technology, paints with his eyes. The technology to paint with your eyes or the ability to be a brilliant dancer with one leg is so inspiring. These things are in the same category as the awe we feel when we look up at the stars and wonder what's out there?
We are inspired by people, who instead of asking "why me"? ask why not me?
We are inspired by those people because, in the length of time it takes most of us to complain about the problem we're having, those people are half way to finding a solution. We have the same 24 hours in a day as they have. How are you spending yours?
I'll leave you this week with the two questions that the person who instigated the invention of the motion sensing glasses asks himself.
If not me, who?
If not now, when?
C ya next week.
We are inspired by people, who instead of asking "why me"? ask why not me?
We are inspired by those people because, in the length of time it takes most of us to complain about the problem we're having, those people are half way to finding a solution. We have the same 24 hours in a day as they have. How are you spending yours?
I'll leave you this week with the two questions that the person who instigated the invention of the motion sensing glasses asks himself.
If not me, who?
If not now, when?
C ya next week.
Tuesday, April 12, 2011
Tuesday, April 5, 2011
Tuesday, March 29, 2011
Change
Ever wonder why real change is so difficult?
Consider breaking a habit: why do you suppose that you slide back to your 'old ways' again and again?
You have two components to your mind: conscious and subconscious. The conscious mind handles all the logical business (weighing, considering and accepting or rejecting) and the subconscious mind handles everything else (including imagining, daydreaming, wishing and hoping). If you LOVE to eat too much or drink too much or smoke or whatever, you do the loving of those things with your subconscious mind. You have to marry the warm fuzzy feelings/thoughts of drinking & smoking with your imagination: with the IDEA of this being a good thing to do...the reasons you choose are your own (sort of).
Enjoyment happens in the imagination (subconscious mind). You don't 'rationalize' enjoyment (conscious mind) unless you have already decided you want to enjoy (subconscious mind) something. If you decide you need to quit something for health reasons, you do that with your conscious (logical) mind. You then use your 'will' (conscious mind) to try and turn your craving (subconscious compulsion) away from whatever you're trying to quit doing when the urge (subconscious mind) arises. It's estimated that the conscious mind takes up 5 % of total mind and the subconscious mind takes up the other 95%. Ever see 5 of anything in a fight with 95 of anything? Are you still wondering why real change is so difficult?
Comments welcome. :)
C ya next week.
Consider breaking a habit: why do you suppose that you slide back to your 'old ways' again and again?
You have two components to your mind: conscious and subconscious. The conscious mind handles all the logical business (weighing, considering and accepting or rejecting) and the subconscious mind handles everything else (including imagining, daydreaming, wishing and hoping). If you LOVE to eat too much or drink too much or smoke or whatever, you do the loving of those things with your subconscious mind. You have to marry the warm fuzzy feelings/thoughts of drinking & smoking with your imagination: with the IDEA of this being a good thing to do...the reasons you choose are your own (sort of).
Enjoyment happens in the imagination (subconscious mind). You don't 'rationalize' enjoyment (conscious mind) unless you have already decided you want to enjoy (subconscious mind) something. If you decide you need to quit something for health reasons, you do that with your conscious (logical) mind. You then use your 'will' (conscious mind) to try and turn your craving (subconscious compulsion) away from whatever you're trying to quit doing when the urge (subconscious mind) arises. It's estimated that the conscious mind takes up 5 % of total mind and the subconscious mind takes up the other 95%. Ever see 5 of anything in a fight with 95 of anything? Are you still wondering why real change is so difficult?
Comments welcome. :)
C ya next week.
Tuesday, March 22, 2011
Bullying
Unless you've been under a rock someplace or you don't own a computer, you've heard by now about the little Australian boy who has become a hero by being more violent then the child that was picking on him. I couldn't find the video to tell you how many millions of times it's been viewed but I did see it on every major news outlet and the boy will probably be going on tour soon... perhaps a co-bill with Charlie Sheen...
These boys are two sides of the same coin. Bullies feel powerless so they take their power from someone else: usually the most powerless kid they can find. Now I know some of you are going to have a fit (at least I hope so) and say I'm blaming the victim, but it should be perfectly obvious to us that both of these boys are victims and I'm not blaming anyone. If the kid who was bullied felt worthy enough, he would have a bunch of loving friends. Kids with a bunch of friends don't get bullied. If the bully felt worthy enough he would have been doing something constructive with his time instead of hanging out with a bunch of other kids who actually found this atrocity funny enough to film. Maybe he would have even been friends with the kid he was bullying.
We, as individuals within a society, need to reconnect with our own power. That never comes from someone else. That is the only way we can teach our children to do the same.
Now, I know some of you are saying that the child should not stand there and let the bully 'get away with it' and I agree with you. What I'm saying is that we have failed both of these kids by allowing them to feel powerless enough to find themselves in this situation in the first place.
How different would this whole debate be if the bully had landed on his head and died? Who would be the hero then?
We are calling this boy a hero. Do we really need a bunch of powerless children all over the world right now striving to be a hero? If these kids had gotten the kind of attention that would allowed them to understand how powerful they really are, they surely (neither one of them) would not be getting the kind of attention they are getting right now.
But, the pendulum swings. There is no up without down and the incident happened (I hope) so that at the very least we could learn something. So what did society supposedly learn? That we should hit the kid that hits us, harder then he hit us. THEN, you too can become a hero, be celebrated by millions and end up on the news.
These boys are two sides of the same coin. Bullies feel powerless so they take their power from someone else: usually the most powerless kid they can find. Now I know some of you are going to have a fit (at least I hope so) and say I'm blaming the victim, but it should be perfectly obvious to us that both of these boys are victims and I'm not blaming anyone. If the kid who was bullied felt worthy enough, he would have a bunch of loving friends. Kids with a bunch of friends don't get bullied. If the bully felt worthy enough he would have been doing something constructive with his time instead of hanging out with a bunch of other kids who actually found this atrocity funny enough to film. Maybe he would have even been friends with the kid he was bullying.
We, as individuals within a society, need to reconnect with our own power. That never comes from someone else. That is the only way we can teach our children to do the same.
Now, I know some of you are saying that the child should not stand there and let the bully 'get away with it' and I agree with you. What I'm saying is that we have failed both of these kids by allowing them to feel powerless enough to find themselves in this situation in the first place.
How different would this whole debate be if the bully had landed on his head and died? Who would be the hero then?
We are calling this boy a hero. Do we really need a bunch of powerless children all over the world right now striving to be a hero? If these kids had gotten the kind of attention that would allowed them to understand how powerful they really are, they surely (neither one of them) would not be getting the kind of attention they are getting right now.
But, the pendulum swings. There is no up without down and the incident happened (I hope) so that at the very least we could learn something. So what did society supposedly learn? That we should hit the kid that hits us, harder then he hit us. THEN, you too can become a hero, be celebrated by millions and end up on the news.
Tuesday, March 15, 2011
Teflon Mind
OK,
So I've invented a new game.
For the average person, part of enjoying life in peaceful coexistence with your fellow human beings, is trying to 'get through' the day without coming across like the "A-hole' you think many of them are. Now I have to tell you I'm in a pretty brilliant mood right now and I'm finding this really funny but there's nothing funny about walking around in a huge funk because someone 'else' (as though that were possible) P'ed you off. I was with my partner in the grocery yesterday and 'god bless her' as we say her in NL, she was having a day. You know those days when you can't believe they're charging that much for... and the person on the mobile phone should either shop or... and the quality of the produce is... OK, we get the point.
So, I invented a game called teflon mind. You know that stuff that frying pans are made out of that doesn't stick? Well, I have this theory that many of us have way too sticky a mind. In other words, we make ourselves sick or angry or anything else, by dwelling on things that are none of our business. Take for example the price of something in the market or someone on their phone. You have one of two choices which seems so obvious really, but still so many of us take choice number three. Bitch and complain and then go ahead and do what we were going to have to do anyway: buy the product or don't and/or walk around or wait for the person on the phone. As far as the person on the phone is concerned, you could just realize that you neither had to go around or wait for the person, you were just judging them on automatic pilot without ever considering that you didn't need to. With the obvious choice, they finish their conversation about something that was none of your business and you don't get an ulcer...reasonable trade off if I ever heard one. So Back to the game...
I promise, the next time you're at the grocery and you or your partner is having a bad day, you will turn it around in an instant with this game. *Warning* You have to discuss the rules before either of you is in a bad mood or you might get a punch in your not so teflon head...just sayin'.
Before you walk into the grocery store, put on your imaginary teflon helmet. Ok I know I don't sound the least bit sane here but you are smilin' already I can feel it. Now, since I know some of you, please don't get a real teflon helmet or if you do, let me know when you're getting groceries and I'll go somewhere else... OK, so, put on your imaginary helmet and the game begins. As you walk into the super market, nothing can stick to your mind for the whole time you're there. The price is the price. There are carts or their aren't. There are people on their phones or there aren't. It is crowded or it isn't. Don't let a single one of these or any other judgments 'stick' to your mind. Now here's the catch. You don't get to win this game until you've gone through one complete trip the the market without a single fraction of a second 'stick'. Think you can?
You will be amazed at how enjoyable the time in there can be. So much so in fact, that if you practice this on days when you're in a great mood and then continue to practice every time you go into the market, you will find after a while, you won't need your teflon helmet in there any more. Then, you can start taking it to work, or anywhere else you want to take it.
Let me know how it goes. Feedback welcome.
C ya next week!
So I've invented a new game.
For the average person, part of enjoying life in peaceful coexistence with your fellow human beings, is trying to 'get through' the day without coming across like the "A-hole' you think many of them are. Now I have to tell you I'm in a pretty brilliant mood right now and I'm finding this really funny but there's nothing funny about walking around in a huge funk because someone 'else' (as though that were possible) P'ed you off. I was with my partner in the grocery yesterday and 'god bless her' as we say her in NL, she was having a day. You know those days when you can't believe they're charging that much for... and the person on the mobile phone should either shop or... and the quality of the produce is... OK, we get the point.
So, I invented a game called teflon mind. You know that stuff that frying pans are made out of that doesn't stick? Well, I have this theory that many of us have way too sticky a mind. In other words, we make ourselves sick or angry or anything else, by dwelling on things that are none of our business. Take for example the price of something in the market or someone on their phone. You have one of two choices which seems so obvious really, but still so many of us take choice number three. Bitch and complain and then go ahead and do what we were going to have to do anyway: buy the product or don't and/or walk around or wait for the person on the phone. As far as the person on the phone is concerned, you could just realize that you neither had to go around or wait for the person, you were just judging them on automatic pilot without ever considering that you didn't need to. With the obvious choice, they finish their conversation about something that was none of your business and you don't get an ulcer...reasonable trade off if I ever heard one. So Back to the game...
I promise, the next time you're at the grocery and you or your partner is having a bad day, you will turn it around in an instant with this game. *Warning* You have to discuss the rules before either of you is in a bad mood or you might get a punch in your not so teflon head...just sayin'.
Before you walk into the grocery store, put on your imaginary teflon helmet. Ok I know I don't sound the least bit sane here but you are smilin' already I can feel it. Now, since I know some of you, please don't get a real teflon helmet or if you do, let me know when you're getting groceries and I'll go somewhere else... OK, so, put on your imaginary helmet and the game begins. As you walk into the super market, nothing can stick to your mind for the whole time you're there. The price is the price. There are carts or their aren't. There are people on their phones or there aren't. It is crowded or it isn't. Don't let a single one of these or any other judgments 'stick' to your mind. Now here's the catch. You don't get to win this game until you've gone through one complete trip the the market without a single fraction of a second 'stick'. Think you can?
You will be amazed at how enjoyable the time in there can be. So much so in fact, that if you practice this on days when you're in a great mood and then continue to practice every time you go into the market, you will find after a while, you won't need your teflon helmet in there any more. Then, you can start taking it to work, or anywhere else you want to take it.
Let me know how it goes. Feedback welcome.
C ya next week!
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